It has been two days since I walked away from my job. I did everything right. I even gave them more than two weeks. Today when I should have driven to work after I dropped my mother off at her job, I drove home. I should feel weird right? I’ve worked this job for two years and have had a pretty consistent schedule the entire time. I thought that I would feel panicked, especially considering that I was panicking on my last day. I mean, I did just quit my job to become a full-time writer. Now I have to rely on my writing to pay the bills and I’m not happy to say that it doesn’t look good.
I only have one book out and it’s not selling the way I thought it would. I had such high expectations for my career and now I am really going to try and make a go of it.
So why am I not panicked?
I feel almost… calm.
At peace with my decision, really.
I feel like everything is going to be okay, which is very weird because I have high anxiety and depression and normally I would be freaking out. Like I should be balled up in a corner, rocking and crying.
Yet, I feel completely fine. My heart is racing like it normally does and I’m not running through all of the worse possible outcomes.
Will things be okay?
I guess I’ll just have to wait and see.